I got a variety of responses when people found out I was taking my 20-month-old daughter to Kenya on a safari. “Don’t do it. She won’t remember.” “Don’t do it. It’s too dangerous.” “That sounds exhausting.” And my favorite, “Wow! That sounds like such an epic trip!” The vast majority of comments (and facial expressions) were negative, but like all my other best life choices, that only made me more determined to make the experience a positive one.
Was it always easy? No. When has anyone ever done something memorable that was “easy” or “comfortable?” Taking my daughter with me on this trip of a lifetime was the right choice for us. And these are the most important reasons why I chose to take my toddler on safari. (And… Would I do it again?)
Because she loves animals.
Iris, my daughter, loves everything. She is so full of love and joy, it truly overflows from her, and it’s the cutest, sweetest thing. She gets excited when we see dogs on our morning stroller runs. She likes seeing my parents’ gigantic orange cat when we go visit their farm. Any time she sees an animal, she points excitedly and sometimes blows it a kiss! So I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to see her doing those things with larger animals. And she did. She didn’t want to touch any of them (except a baby zebra–so sweet!), but she wanted to look at them, blow kisses, and wave at them. I wouldn’t trade those memories for staying home where it’s “safe.”
Related: The Best Trips for Animal Lovers
Because she is a very chill baby.
No baby or toddler is “low maintenance,” but if anyone was, it would be Iris. She’s not a big cryer without reason, and she’s perpetually happy to be attached to me in the wearable carrier. She’s always just gone along with whatever I was doing and wherever I was going, so I wasn’t worried about her having jet lag or trying unfamiliar foods or anything like that. She’s been traveling with my husband and me, and then just me, since she was seven weeks old, so this is the life she knows. She sleeps well on planes, and honestly, she’s definitely a more chill traveler than I am!
More here: What It’s Like Staying at the Viral Giraffe Manor
Because the memories at this stage aren’t for her.
Yes, I would love it if she could remember this trip, but she’s too young. Does that mean I’m not allowed to make memories with her? Or course not. I’m utterly grateful for the memories I have of her waving to the giraffe at our balcony. I love the pictures of us feeding a giraffe from a rope swing at Giraffe Manor. We saw mommy and baby rhino pairs, as a mommy and baby human pair. I love that I got a video of her petting the baby zebra so I can show it to her one day.
I will always remember playing “Circle of Life” from The Lion King on my phone while we were having a bush breakfast, with rhinos in the background, as she danced in circles and squatted down and spun around again. She wouldn’t do that the same way, with the same free-spiritedness, as a 13-year old if I’d waited until she could “remember” and “appreciate” a trip like this. I have no regrets in that regard. Only fun, happy, joy-filled memories.
Also this: The Top 7 Reasons Why Single Parents Should Travel with their Kids
Because experiences shape her, even if she doesn’t remember.
What if I didn’t ever speak to her before she started talking, because she wouldn’t remember and wouldn’t be able to talk back to me? That would be ridiculous. Babies, toddlers, and children absorb everything around them, and it shapes them. Everything they’re exposed to in taste, touch, sight, hearing, and smell helps to connect the dots in their brains. Every experience shapes who they’ll become.
I’m sure the reason Iris is such an easy traveler is because she’s been doing it since she was a newborn. She doesn’t have memories of that first trip, but those experiences shaped her as a traveler now. So she won’t remember the giraffes at giraffe manor. I can already tell that she recognizes her giraffe bathtub toy at home in a way she didn’t before. She is always learning, so I want to always be giving her experiences from which she can learn.
Read next: Tips for Your Safari at Solio Lodge by The Safari Collection
Because no one knows how long they have.
There is a dark cloud that follows me everywhere, all over the world, and that is the fact that my healthy, beloved, kind husband died when Iris was only six months old. His name was Steve. Steve and I made an effort to live our lives to the fullest In our 12.5 years together, and 10.5 years of marriage. We took a “trip of a lifetime” every year. When we wanted to go somewhere, we went. I’ll always remember going to a luau for our third anniversary on the Big Island of Hawai’i, and a woman seemed shocked but ultimately said, “Good for you for not waiting for a big anniversary to come to Hawai’i!” It never occurred to us not to take a memorable trip for our anniversary. Every occasion is once-in-a-lifetime.
That said, there are trips I wish my husband and I had taken, and this safari trip to Kenya was one of them. Steve actually vetoed it years ago because he had been on a safari before, and it wasn’t a good experience for him. This was the only trip he ever said he’d rather not take. But I wanted to, so I decided I couldn’t wait anymore. Because I don’t know how long I have to live. I don’t know how long I’ll have Iris. Anything can happen, even when you’re simply eating a meal in business class on an airplane, like my husband was doing when he choked to death right next to me and our sleeping daughter. I never recommend waiting to do the things you feel passionate about. It’s not worth the risk of waiting.
Keep reading: Why I Chose to Travel My the First Year as a Widow
Would I do it again?
Yes. I would 100% do this same, exact trip again with my daughter! Parents know their children best, so make the choice that’s right for you and your family. For me? this was the right choice. I tried to make it as low-stress as possible–I booked a luxury trip with a reputable company, I brought a friend to help me with Iris for the entire trip, and I asked for help when I needed it. I would do it all over again in a heartbeat. No regrets, y’all.
Read next: 10 Things You Forgot to Pack for Your Safari
Want more? Check out my dedicated Kenya Page!
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